Colors Of You

from by Serene Envy

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March 1st.


Hung a frame of you up on my wall
above my bed
So you're with me when I'm up
thinking of nothing at all
I'm so hard on myself
because this loss wasn't so small
I came back home and never called you. I wasn't a friend.
How dare I think I had the bare right to want to prepare myself to see you with your face staring up eyes closed. I was scared as hell. Why you. Why now. Why go?
You were the funniest man that id known
Bottle in your hand I can see you by the bridge
Who wouldve thought love for your land would lead to all of this
Men approaching you funny was not part of the plan
They heard you got money on hold. Not no more. Chopped off your hands
The agony you start to demand them to stop
But how. Vision getting blurry
They grab you by your hands and knees and then you dropped
Puddle by the river currents start running even the fish are in a hurry
Walking down my block I see my dad posted up
My smile became denial nah that's not what's up
What I tell you bout them Jokes so annoyed by them
Walked in to see momma tears on the floor and I joined right in
Booked the next flight but something wasn't clicking
They claim my uncle killed himself while chugging on the liquid
Run up to his casket but I don't think he heard me thru the sniffling
Families a touchy subject. murderer was in the kitchen
Funny when it hits you cause you struggle to accept it
Everybody wanting seconds is their something that I'm missing
Spent that week at Maria's and it became so clear
How your wife going to claim to be happier now that her bae's not here?
I'm no stranger to the juice and the anger it induces
I have no need for it . my troubles are handled in my music
my brother starts chatting and theirs a turning in my stomach
When he admits to knowing who it was but how u deserved what u had coming
Never have I cried so much
Waking up that's if I slept to my eyes sown shut
When I die imma leave you the house and the cattle to raise
I laughed as we ate those tamales that sat on my plate
Nobody talked to me like you did. A star from the jump
And I'll never forget the love you showed to Uncle Mario's son
Cause a kid ain't to blame for the errors of the grown
Then again, that's something I learned better on my own


from THE EARTH IS BALD, released August 30, 2015
J Dilla - Colors of You Instrumental
Serene Envy



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